DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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