she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
