just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
