oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Randomize
