Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
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