the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
