If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize
