what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
