Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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