It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
