Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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