This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize