Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
