We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
