Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
