And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
