Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
