How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
