I looked at my own cervix.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
