What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Randomize
