one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Did we literally take a cab across the street
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
