I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
How external is "for external use only"?
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
