i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
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