why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
