I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
