Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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