WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Randomize
