You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
