You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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