Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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