The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize
