Barsexuality is the new black.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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