I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
A+ Viking dick
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
