If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Randomize
