Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Michael Bay diarrhea
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
foreskin is a definite game changer
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize
