Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Randomize
