LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize
