My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
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