Do vagina's smell?
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
