"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
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