He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Randomize
