Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
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