I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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