Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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