I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
