found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
