Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
