You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
