IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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