She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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